There’s no place like home for the holidays.

Happy Christmas friends!! I hope you all had a glorious day with your families and that Santa was very, very good to you because you deserve it. You’re good peeps.

I got to North Carolina on Saturday and I’m here until next Wednesday and I couldn’t be happier.

Christmas pajamas for everyone!!
Christmas pajamas for everyone!!

This is exactly what I needed to take a step back from things, spend some good quality time with my momma,  and re-evaluate some life choices. I feel like when I’m here I get a lot of time to look at my life from a different perspective, and kind of rearrange where some of my priorities lie. I welcome this  obnoxious introspective attitude with open arms this year. I’m starting to feel really cranky and complacent with where I am in my life, so I’m looking forward to coming back to the Midwest with a renewed sense of who I am and what I want to be doing.

Also, I got a Keurig for Christmas. So I’m pretty stoked to come back with that too.



Holy Holiday Hangover

Disclaimer: I KNOW I promised more photos, but I’m an idiot and didn’t charge my camera battery correctly. It’s REALLY charged now, so there really will be pictures in the future. I PROMISE.

I know I’m way late with this post, but I didn’t get back from NC until Wednesday night. So while most people realized their holiday celebrations made them feel like death on Monday or Tuesday, I was still up to my elbows in Christmas goodies lovin’ life until Wednesday. Yesterday hit and I. Felt. TERRIBLE.

I ate not one thing that was good for me the entire week. Any vegetable I ate was covered in cheese or sour cream or french fried onions. I did no type of physical activity in any way, except walking from the couch to the kitchen to get more fatty food and then planting myself back on the couch. And I’m fairly certain I did not drink one single day’s worth of water in the week I was there. Like, over the course of an ENTIRE week, I did not drink 8 glasses of water. That’s insane! Yesterday I felt stupid fat, crazy bloated, and was SEVERELY dehydrated.

So yesterday morning I woke up feeling like I had been hit by a truck and decided I needed to attempt to undo the damage of the past week. I ate a multi grain (Grains! I forgot they existed!) english muffin with some peanut butter and started chugging water like it was my job. I headed to the grocery store and loaded up on some health conscious foods to make me feel like a real life human being again. I took my baby angel dog friend for a walk in this lovely spring weather we have here in Illinois. Seriously, global warming, WTF!?

Amazingly enough I’m already feeling like more of a human. I’m really trying to make this stuff like eating whole grains and vegetables and drinking my water and walking my dog and doing other types of activities more of my norm so I can feel like a real human all the time. I’m grown now so it’s probably time for me to turn this kind of stuff into habits and be a healthy grown up person. I’m pretty pumped to start my job next week and get into a routine that includes healthy eating and hopefully figuring out a way to exercise on the daily too. I’m not making you guys any promises, and I’m not making this shit a New Years Resolution or anything, because let’s be honest, those are long forgotten about by about January 9th. I’m just going to try. That’s all I can do, right? Right.

Adios amigos. I’m off to finalize my NYE plans. I HATE NYE. Worst, most overrated holiday of them all.

A day late, but you’ll forgive me.


I hope everyone had a fabulous day full of really delicious food that was really bad for you, family & friends, and a crapload of happy fuzzy warm loveyness. And that Santa was good to you, of course.

We got to my Mom’s house Thursday evening. Let me just tell you guys, riding in a Chevrolet Cavalier with Truman, Sophia, enough oxygen tanks to keep a small country going for a month, and half of the possessions we own in life for 10 hours is QUITE a treat. Add in a torrential downpour for 75% of the drive and it is something I cannot even put into words. Needless to say, I have never been happier to exit a vehicle in all the days of my life.


This face made up for it. That white blur in the back is Sophia. Obviously.

 Thursday evening my Momma made me one of my fave meals for dinner, and I basically just refused to move from the couch until dragging myself to my bed and sleeping for 11 hours. It. Was. Glorious.

Friday afternoon was a baking extravaganza-pumpkin & pecan pies, snickerdoodles, and my all time favorite-pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. The day of fatness was then rounded out by a trip to my favorite Italian restaurant for dinner. Can you tell when I come home I call the shots? We’re not even done discussing all of my favorites that have been consumed so far. I might be a bit spoiled. I’m an only child. What do you expect!? Also, visits revolving around food MAY play a large part in my chunkalicious body type. Just maybe…

So, anyway, Christmas Eve we had yet another bombass dinner of beef strogonaff, one of mi Madre’s specialties. It was DELICIOUS. We kept with our Christmas Eve traditions of watching It’s A Wonderful Life after dinner and getting to open ONE present, which of course is festive Christmas pajamas for everyone. I love George Bailey and I love Christmas pajamas. Win/win. 

Christmas morning came and I was very happy. I don’t really have that one thing I’m DYING for like I did when I was a child, which makes things a little less exciting. But I did pretty well. Some gift cards, some movies, a reading light for my Kindle. Pretty boring grown up gifts. I think I might start asking for American Girl dolls again just to make things more exciting. (You can tell a lot about a person by which American Girl doll they pined after in their youth. I was a Samantha. Obviously. Which American Girl were you??)

After presents comes waffles for breakfast. This has been happening for more years than I can count, since my Grandma received a waffle iron as a gift when I was still a tot. I love waffles, so of course I’m down with this tradition. Christmas dinner was AMAZEBALLLLLLS this year. By far one of my faves. We traditionally go with turkey for Thanksgiving, ham for Christmas and this year was no exception. I find that people have a pretty serious stance on turkey vs. ham for holiday celebrations. I’m gonna be straight with you guys, I’m all about ham. Turkey’s alright I guess. I’m a BIG fan of all the food that goes along with the turkey at Thanksgiving. Stuffing!? Helllllls yes. Turkey? Eh.  Ham? GIMME. So, yeah, just thought you guys should know my stance on that. Christmas=Ham=Happiness.

We also have this weird tradition, I’m not entirely sure where it came from, of going to the movies on Christmas. Maybe because I love the Jews so much we decided to celebrate the holiday like the Jewish folk do? Seriously, no idea. But we go. This year we saw We Bought a Zoo. I thought it sounded STUPID. But Matt Damon was in it, and I love me some Damon. The movie was legit, I’ll admit it. ScarJo makes me want to punch a kitten in the face a little, but overall a nice story.

And that catches you folks up on my life. Today has been pure laziness, leftovers, and sweatpants. Currently my Maja is fixing my all time favorite dinner, chicken enchiladas with white sauce and homemade guacamole. NOM. How am I not morbidly obese yet? No idea. When I leave here Wednesday I’m not eating for a month. I may actually  have to be rolled home, I don’t know if I’ll fit in a Cavalier….

Merry Christmas friends!


Christmas miracles!!! And stuff.

Holla! I have so much to tell you guys.

In typical Truman fashion, my Grandpa decided Monday, out of the blue, that he in fact WOULD like to travel to North Carolina for Christmas this year. I have been preaching for months now about how we should do WHATEVER TDog wants for Christmas, because who knows how many more we’re going to get to have him around for. Seriously, PREACHING this shit. It was obnoxious. So, I have spent the last few days getting everything figured out for us to head out there. Tomorrow morning we are heading South for the holiday. That’s right…I will be spending 10 LONG hours in a Cavalier with Truman tomorrow. Prayers for everyone to arrive safe and sane are appreciated.

And in OTHER news, I got a job offer today!!! It’s a Christmas miracle!!! I’m going to make trains! Okay, fine, I’m going to be an admin assistant. But it’s AT A PLACE WHERE THEY MAKE TRAINS!! I’m so f’ing happy it’s dumb. Being unemployed sucks dick.

Here’s the deal guys, 2011 has been QUITE a year for me. Parts really good and parts REALLY bad. I moved back to Illinois from North Carolina, worked a crappy job with a crappy commute that I hated, my car was a broken piece for a hot minute, I got a job that I honestly liked, dealt with Pastor Man dramatics, fell even more in love with my bombass friends (which I didn’t even think was possible), took care of Truman, lost my job, dealt with family dramatics, and here we are.

Honestly I feel like things are coming together. Although we still have our issues, I’m stoked I’m going to be spending Christmas in NC with my family the way it’s supposed to be instead of here alone with TDog trying to make things festive and having his Grumpasaurus self bringing me down all day and focusing all my energy on not having a festive Christmas nervous breakdown. I get to go to NC for a week without the pressure of trying to find a job while I’m there. I get a full week to spend with Rico Suave (my mom’s dog. He. Is. AMAZING.), relax, eat enough food to last me all of next year, and just chill. I don’t have to spend Christmas away from my momma for the first time ever. I like this.

Then I get to come home and spend New Years Eve with my friends. Not all of them, it makes me sad that we’re getting older and can’t all spend NYE together anymore, but I’ll get to celebrate with at least some of my favorite people, which is good enough for me. Then I start 2012 with a brand new job. Basically, life is good.

Christmas miracles all around!! I’ll let you kids know if we all arrive in Asheville alive tomorrow. Seriously, I’m not even joking, pray for me. Truman and I almost kill each other if we spend too much time in this large house with separate rooms together. An entire day smushed in a car together could end TERRIBLY. Lord, hear our prayer.


Happy Hanukkah to you, friends!!

Fun fact about me for those of you who aren’t aware-I. LOVE. HANUKKAH. Now, you may say to yourself, “I didn’t even realize she was Jewish! She’s talked about her Native American background, but never of her Jewish faith. Mazel to her!”

No. I’m not Jewish in any way. I’m Cherokee and Irish and I was raised a Lutheran. But I LOVE the Jewish folk.

I’ve been overly interested in the Holocaust since, like, third grade. I insisted on doing all my social studies projects about it throughout grade school. It’s a creepy weird obsession. If you want to become one of my favorite people, take me to the Holocaust museum. I’ve never been and I desperately want to go. (I’m f’ing WEIRD you guys. You should know this by now.)

I will openly admit my true interest in the Jewish folk of our time came from a little family who lived in the OC named the Cohens. Seth Cohen!? Swoooooooon. From my friend Seth, I adopted my favorite holiday of the year-Chrismukkah! I have Chrismukkah celebrations where I invite my friends over to help me put up my Christmas tree with ornaments in the traditional Hanukkah colors of silver and blue. We make Chrismukkah cookies. Hang stockings and put up menorah decorations. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.

And yes, I will tell you guys that I’m not mad at the fact my Grandpa has chosen to have all of his doctors conveniently located at Barnes JEWISH Hospital in St. Louis. I will also not deny that when accompanying him on doctor visits I spend a little extra time putting myself together just in case I run into that special Jewish doctor and we fall in love and get married and live happily ever after celebrating Chrismukkah for years to come. WHAT!? You’d do it too.

So anyway, I just wanted to stop by and wish you all a happy, happy, happy, happy Hanukkah!!! Mazel to you and yours!

Christmas makes people assholes.

Heeeeey-o! You guys really know how to welcome me back with open arms. Yesterday I had the most views of my little blogging life. Glad to see you’re not holding a grudge over my December slacking. Thanks pals!

So today I had to trek out to the other side of St. Louis to pick up my best friend’s birthday present-WAIT until I can tell you all what it is after I give it to her tomorrow. It. Is. Fantastic. HA!

Anyway, after I picked that up I started on my Christmas shopping. That’s correct…STARTED. I’ll probably finish up on or around Christmas Eve. That’s just how I roll. So, what I learned today is people are ASSHOLES during the holidays. There is no Christmas spirit. No ’tis the season. People are basically evil.

My car almost got hit at least 17 times because people either a. don’t know how to drive or b. NEED that parking spot 23 steps closer to the door and will take you the f out to get it. Hold the door for people? They don’t give no fucks. Say excuse me if someone is in your way? Shit, you’re bothersome. Shut the hole in your face and leave them ALONE. It was pure evil chaos. And people apparently just don’t give a SHIT how badly their children behave in public during Christmas season. Children were running AMUCK through the aisles of Target. Moral of this story: Christmas shopping is not a jolly time.

So true.

In completely unrelated news, I’m making my first Pinterest recipe for dinner tonight. That’s right, I conquered Pinterest. I’m totally into it now.  Follower success. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Have a fab weekend friends!

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, Sorry I’m So Crazy. (That’s how the song really goes. Duh.)

Hola amigos. Bet you thought I forgot about you. Fear not, I’m back to entertain you with tales of my boring hot mess life. Yaaaaay!!

Today I woke up in a BAD. MOOD. I literally refused to get out of bed for a long ass time because I was so f’ing grumpy. There was no reason for my grumpasaurus attitude. I just woke up feeling like a Debbie Downer and let the feeling hang around without doing anything about it. About an hour after I finally drug myself out of bed and into the land of the living Truman popped in and asked if I wanted to go get our Christmas tree today. Turns out that’s exactly what I needed. A little holiday cheer perked me right up. We headed out and get ourselves a lovely pre-lit tree (Seriously. Why have I not had a pre-lit tree before!? Not having to walk around in tiny circles putting lights on the tree is MAGICAL.) and a few other festive decor items.

I came home, made myself a phenomenal Christmas playlist on Spotify (also, Spotify=AWESOME), lit the Christmas tree scented candles throughout the house and got to work.

Fun fact, if I ever have kids one day, they cannot have a fun Christmas tradition of decorating the tree. My OCD kicks in full force when it comes to ornament placement. Tdog almost got his hand snatched off when he attempted to jack up the system I had going on with my ornaments. Also, when I was a child I got to get a new ornament every year and our tree was always a motley crew of ornaments from my mom, my grandparents and myself throughout the years. Sadly, my child cannot have that experience either because I’m not down with a cluster-fuck Christmas tree. I like it to be clean and beautiful. Garland/tinsel is tacky and a waste of my time. Multi-colored lights make me want to punt a kitten. My ornaments all go together in a complimentary fashion. This year I’ve got white lights (obviously) with silver and light blue ornaments. I’m into a clean, well decorated tree with perfectly placed ornaments.


Sorry in advance to any future children for my OCD tendencies ruining your Christmas fun. You’ll get over it.